on being a kinshipper

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I don’t know why I never posted this.. I wrote it three years ago..   it seemed relevant to me today, so I thought I’d share.


There are days I feel so very blessed to have these kids and days I am grumpy and discontent. Some days I’m a little bit of both.  It is a very emotional rollercoaster for everyone in the family.  I have such pride in the end of year accomplishments, the badges from scouts, the sports achievements and the end of year grades.  We’ve made it through another school year. My oldest grandson is astounded that he is graduating from the same middle school he started three years ago.   My granddaughter has bridged from Daisy to Brownie to Junior Girl Scout with the same troop she started with way back in 2011.

It seems like such a life time ago, when we picked up three sad children from a loving foster mother. They were excited and so very nervous to come with us.. starting a new life far removed from the life and the lifestyle they knew.    Fortunately time has clouded the memories of hurt and need.  Time has eased the pain of loss and shame.  Time is healing the wounds of the past.   If only there weren’t new wounds.  If the families they love could see the milestones they have reached.  If they could make the time to call and share the trials and successes of the weeks as they fly by.  Instead they ask me to text a parent to remind them to call on Sunday nights.   They ask me to mail letters to a parent who didn’t bother to send a birthday card.  They get very little and still are willing to give their hearts.

I am constantly amazed at the resilience of these small people.    We have had our battles and our turmoils, but we are stronger for it.  We have had our massive disappointments at the choices of some  and the attitudes of other very selfish family members, but the littles and I are getting through it.  We are learning to forge a new path through adolescence.  So many things have not turned out the way we planned, but then again, my life before the littles wasn’t a straight path to happily ever after.


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